An entitled Becky trespasses onto my property, demanding that I allow her entitled child to swim in my private pool. Even after telling them multiple times that they need to get off of my property, this lady simply would not take no for an answer. Here’s what happened.

To provide some backstory and some context, I live right next to a lake. It’s great being able to live here, because in the summer I can just walk from my backyard straight onto the beach. I absolutely love swimming. However, in the late fall to the early spring, the water can be absolutely freezing.

Sometimes I see people go to the lake on warm days, thinking that the lake would be a nice cool temperature, before jumping out, realizing the lake was still freezing. So when the lake was still cold, I decided to get a small heated pool for the backyard. I’ve had this pool for about two years before this incident happened.

In early spring, when the water was absolutely freezing, I had just been swimming in my pool when I had to go inside to use the restroom. I had planned on coming back out, so I had left the pool uncovered. However, when inside, my phone started ringing. I answered the phone, and it was my brother, and he needed me to get some information for him from my computer. So I got distracted for about 30 minutes before finally heading back outside.

And this is when I met this entitled Becky and her spoiled child. Becky had plopped herself down on my lawn chair. Meanwhile, the previous inhabitants of the chair—my hat and sunscreen—were now conveniently laying on the ground. The spoiled child was also already swimming in my pool.

My mind was not completely caught up with why in the world they were in my pool, so I just said, “Um, excuse me, why are you on my property?” The entitled Becky looked up and said, “Oh, is this your property?” Flabbergasted at such a stupid remark, I said, “Yes, this is my property. Why are you here?”

Becky then looked at me and used a tone as if she was explaining something to a child. She said, “You see, my son here wanted to go for a swim, but the lake was a little too cold. Isn’t that right?” I normally have a pretty long fuse, but after hearing her talk to me like a child, it was as if that fuse just got cut a little bit shorter in my mind. So I said to her coldly, “The lake’s cold, but that doesn’t explain why you’re on my property using my pool.”

Becky didn’t like me saying that, because she said, “You do not have to be so rude. I’m just trying to keep my kid happy.” Throughout this, the kid has been swimming around in my pool, clearly just not even paying attention to the conversation.

I say, “Well, I’m sorry, but I don’t let strangers use my things.” I then turned to the kid and said, “So, buddy, you need to get out of the pool.” Maybe this was the wrong move to address the child, because right after that, Becky got up in my face and started screaming at me. She said, “How dare you talk to my child like that? He has feelings too. He deserves to be in that pool! Plus, making him get out of a pool—he could just get hypothermia. Do you want that? Do you want my kid to have hypothermia?”

At this point, I had no idea what exactly I said to make Becky explode at me, so I just turned back to her and calmly but sternly told her, “Look, I don’t care how cold the lake is. It’s a warm day. After swimming in this pool, in no way could he still get cold. And secondly, he has no right to be in this pool. This is my property, and you and your son both need to leave before I call the cops.”

To be honest, I’ve never heard of an argument escalating this fast, and now here I am in a situation I can hardly even believe. Becky did not miss a beat. She just yelled, “Good! Go ahead and call the cops. I’ll just tell them that you’ve threatened my child and you harassed me.”

I looked this entitled Becky right in the eye and opened my mouth, but before I could say anything, she put her hand up as if to silence me, before going over to her child and saying, in a sweet tone, “It’s okay. This mean man just wasn’t raised as a caring person or someone who shared. I’ll raise you better.”

I was utterly stunned. Not only did she silence me, but she went and told her child that I was a jerk. So I responded, “Well, if I was raised wrong, then you clearly weren’t raised at all. You’re acting like an infant. Now get your baby emotions and your spoiled child off my property.”

I had never before come up with such a good insult on the spot before, but man, did that feel good. This time, it was her turn to be stunned. She did not say a word. She just pulled her child out of the pool, grabbed her stuff off of my chair, kicked it over, and walked off my lawn with her kid in tow, before yelling curse words back at me and flipping me off.

Throughout this, I just stood there with a small smile on my face. But in truth, I was absolutely fuming. It had started so fast and ended even quicker. I have never seen her or her entitled child ever again. However, I have been worried about something like that happening again, so I installed cameras around the house just in case.

It’s crazy to think that someone would be so entitled that they would try and act like they have some weird privilege over your personal property. Like, can you imagine what would have happened if that kid got hurt on your property while they’re just swimming around at your pool? That lady would have sued you for sure. There’s no way I would let that person stay on my property and swim in my pool if I was in your shoes. And honestly, you did the right thing by threatening to call the police. This lady trespassed on your property and tried to push her will on you—like, what a terrible parent.

And the fact that you put cameras around your house just because of this incident is a fantastic idea. That was literally going to be my biggest suggestion while reading this. Hopefully this lady never comes back, and hopefully this kind of thing never happens again, because it’s your pool and it’s your property, and you should not have to bend to some weird lady’s demands just because she’s entitled.

Everyone that I talk to about my engagement says terrible negative things, and I don’t know what to do. I am engaged to my fiance, and since getting engaged I have encountered many people who have either told me that I am too young to get married, or that we haven’t gotten to know each other long enough, or that we should not bother getting married. One colleague even went so far as to tell me to let them know when I get divorced.

A good example of these negative comments happened today. I went to the nail salon, and my nail lady asked me about my ring, and once I explained it to her she said that she was excited to paint my nails for my wedding. An older woman who was eavesdropping decided to butt in and laugh. She then told me that I’m way too young to get married. I tried to laugh it off by saying, “Oh, thanks for letting me know my eye cream works,” but she ruined our conversation and put a dampener on my excitement.

I now don’t go around broadcasting our engagement, as I know people don’t really care and I don’t want to push my personal life into people’s faces. But if it comes up in conversation, I’ll happily chat about our plans, and I’m astonished when people are bitter about it, as I wouldn’t dare say the same to anyone else if they told me that they were engaged. I don’t expect people to be jumping for joy when I tell them, but I also don’t want people to laugh in my face and tell me that it won’t last.

I don’t care about other people’s opinions of my relationship, as we are completely in love and devoted to one another, but it does get you down when people react by pulling a face and laughing. I also don’t feel I should have to hide our engagement just to appease others either. Has this happened to anyone else? What did you say back to people who were rude to you when you announce your engagement? What should I do?

It’s crazy that people would be this judgmental towards someone who’s getting married. It is so toxic to chime in with some kind of opinion that’s based on absolutely nothing other than how long they’ve been dating. And yeah, the marriage is a little quick in my opinion, but it doesn’t mean I’m gonna vocalize that. Literally this marriage has nothing to do with me, and it’s none of my business.

At most, you would hope that someone would have at least the common courtesy to just say, “Oh, congratulations,” instead of sticking your nose in their business and saying your marriage won’t last. Like, how weird is that? And it’s one of those nasty-nice comments that a person can get from somebody who’s pretending to care. Like, when someone comments like this, they don’t actually care about your life, but instead they’re trying to boil it down into something that it’s not and pigeonhole you into a category that does not classify your situation. This person making this toxic comment probably thinks they’re being helpful, too, when in reality they’re just simply being a jerk.

So if I was in your shoes, I would stop being nice to these types of people. I wouldn’t joke back. I wouldn’t even say anything in response. I would probably just say, “Thanks for your opinion,” and then go about my way, because these people do not define my future marriage.

Here’s the thing: I don’t know how you feel about your fiance, and while I do think that this marriage is definitely happening a little quick in my opinion, it does not mean that it won’t be successful. And it sounds like you love your fiance, so don’t even worry what other people think. I would say if family and friends act this way, then guess what? They don’t have to show up. In fact, if they’re this negative towards you, I just wouldn’t even invite them to the wedding.

People telling you to let them know when you get divorced or saying that your marriage won’t last should be a really good tell of if you should even invite them to your wedding or not. But overall, hopefully these people shut up and mind their own business, and you’re able to get married without any kind of problems from other people, because truly their opinions don’t matter and you should honestly just ignore them.

Me after I said we should end things and break up, but I’m now really torn because I didn’t get any closure out of the situation. What should I do?

My now ex-boyfriend and I had a huge argument last night. Basically, we are both too busy to really work on the relationship, and it feels like our dirty laundry just keeps piling up without finding any appropriate resolutions. I have been thinking a lot about how, at this rate, this just simply wouldn’t work. Perhaps if we had more availability to put more work into the relationship everything would work out, but the way it is, it just won’t.

We have been doing long distance from the beginning and have been seeing each other for three years. I think over time I just started to feel lonely, because every time I wanted to talk about something I knew we had only really an hour to catch up. Plus, I know work was absolutely crushing him. Genuinely, he barely had enough time to sleep and to eat. I felt so guilty adding another thing to his plate. In fact, he would often express that I was adding too much to his plate.

Over time I think it was a mix of guilt and loneliness. I knew that it just simply wouldn’t work out like this, so last night, at the end of the argument where we have been running in circles for hours, I told him that, “Hey, I don’t think this is gonna work.” He immediately hung up on me afterwards and blocked me on various platforms.

I truly love this man, and I care for him even though I know I had to walk away from this relationship. I think he is and will forever be one of the greatest blessings in my life. But I know I said some hurtful things during the argument and then never really got to end things on a better note. I didn’t need it to be perfect, but I didn’t want a heated argument where we said things in the heat of the moment and then we were just gone forever.

I haven’t reached out to him yet, and I don’t know if it’s even a good idea to reach out at this point just to try and talk through things calmly. He has a lot of really old wounds, so I really just want to let him know that he’s a good guy and he deserves so much more love, and that I am not abandoning him because I ran out of love to give. I just wanted us to stop hurting and to stop fighting. How can I ask for closure, if that is even something I should do? Should I text him, or should I try and talk to him over the phone? What should I do?

I think you really need to take the hint and leave him alone. He has blocked you on multiple platforms. In fact, he clearly doesn’t want to be with you anymore. You did just break up with him, and sure, it really is an aggressive way to end a relationship for him to suddenly hang up on you and then block you on every platform, but you said it best—he has some previous trauma when it comes to this, and this is probably how he responds.

You leaving is probably only adding more fuel to that fire, to be honest. And I’m not saying you should have stuck with him, but I honestly don’t think you should be surprised by this response either. But to be completely honest with you, it sounds like you really just want to get the last word in instead of actually talking through this calmly. I don’t know why you want to find closure, to be honest. You’ve already broken up with him. Explaining every single detail associated with it is not going to make things better—like, that’s just gonna hurt more, and if anything it feels like you’re rubbing salt in his old wounds.

So, in my opinion, just leave him alone and move on. I mean, this is what you wanted, right? You wanted to break up with him. And I can tell you from my perspective, I would be very upset and probably furious if my ex-girlfriend was saying, “Oh, we’re breaking up, but don’t worry, you’re still a great guy.” That will literally just make things worse. You’re only going to add to this man’s misery by doing that. That is not a good idea.

Honestly, you got to play your move by breaking up with him. So he got to play his move, which meant he now is never going to talk to you ever again and has blocked you everywhere, basically going no contact. Maybe in some way this makes it feel like he got the last word, but in reality you’ve already broken things off. There’s nothing left to discuss. To go any further than that and to reach out to him again, in my opinion, would be clearly disrespecting his wishes. He doesn’t want to talk to you, and he doesn’t want anything to do with you, so I really think it would be better for you to just move on and to find somebody else in your life, because clearly this relationship was not working.

But hopefully everything works out for you, and hopefully you’re able to find a relationship that brings you the happiness that you absolutely deserve.

Parents blatantly favor my brother, and I am having a hard time dealing with it, and I’m not sure what to do. I’m a 23-year-old male, and I have quite a scenario which I don’t exactly know how to deal with.

Throughout my life I have felt that my parents have heavily preferred my younger brother, who’s about three years younger than me, over myself. Apart from various compliments on his looks, he has given most of what he asked for—something which I never felt I could do, let alone fulfill. They have been more lenient with him, even with regards to finances. Whenever he asked to borrow money or anything at all, eight times out of ten they would give in and give a little bit more than what he asked.

I remember they let him make a purchase for an iPad one Christmas with money he had received from gifts, while I was not allowed to do the same thing. They had lent him money for a car while I was refused any money to borrow from them just a few months prior. They gave him an allowance at the same time that I got one, despite him being three years younger than me. And to top it all off, when I got more money, he got more money as well despite the age difference and the responsibilities. And these are just a few of the examples that I’ve put up with.

On top of this, I had taken the decision to follow my father’s footsteps and take on his same profession. Previously he had tried to urge me to do the same, but once I really made the decision he started to make things difficult for me. Yes, he let me on board and started giving me things to do as I was still getting my university degree to work in the field. However, it took a long time for him to let me join. My brother, on the other hand, who has no interest in taking on the same profession, was easily allowed into helping around despite doing it for just some extra cash.

Now, I know what you’re thinking—things still may seem fair up to this point. However, this is what really infuriates me. When I started, my hours were severely limited, and I had to beg my father to increase hours as I had just been refused another job, and he told me that he had no money to give me. Later, I got another job elsewhere outside of this field, despite not wanting anything else but this profession. When my brother asked for an increase in hours when he had not even been there for a month, he was approved. All my brother needed to do was ask, despite me begging for months.

When I confronted my dad about this, he said that it’s my fault for not asking, despite the fact that there was plenty of evidence suggesting that I did ask him multiple times, if not outright begged him. My brother, on the other hand, never had to find another job until very recently, as he is starting to build up his own profession. He was paid very well from my father since he was offered so much hours. I had been given the opportunity to help out as much as him when he was given the chance, but it was, of course, a few years too late. So because of that, my brother has earned thousands of dollars more than I have.

And yes, I can get a job elsewhere and still remain in the profession, but my father tells me I won’t be employed by anyone else, as they know who he is and they will assume I will leave their wing to go back with my father. He does not want me to leave his side, but even he has to come offer me quite an unattractive pay for my services now, especially since I’m going to be starting full-time employment.

I have absolutely no idea how to digest this, and I think that this has been extremely unfair. Whenever I try to talk it out with my parents, they tell me to not start a fight about things, that I should stay quiet, about stating that I will probably earn more money than my brother in the future. I have even been told that I am mentally ill multiple times because I’ve expressed how unfair this has been to me, as I am quite a driven person and have gone to great links to get where I am today. And to be honest, it has not been easy.

Is this favoritism towards my brother, or am I just being immature? I honestly feel that my parents don’t care much about my life, especially when compared to my brother’s, even though I’ve been the one to set the bar and have achieved more than they had when they themselves were my age. I sometimes think that they are jealous of what I am capable of doing, even academically.

Leaving my father’s wing and taking my profession elsewhere isn’t much of an option, as employment will be hard for me considering I live in a small country and everyone knows everyone here. My father’s argument on being denied a job is quite true, to be honest, despite the great needs for professionals of my qualification. I have a very big desire to follow this fashion, and I am extremely driven for it. I really do not want to abandon this path and start a completely new one just because of my family.

I have honestly grown to hate my family quite deeply after all that has happened to me over the years. I cannot understand how they can live knowing I am not happy with what they have done to me, as I have tried to tell them multiple times. They just expect me to live with it, when this is very crucial to me. I think that they are incompetent when it comes to dealing with people, and I am certain that they have a very low emotional intelligence. They have never—or very rarely—been there for me, and I don’t see them as a support system at all.

How am I to take this, and what should I do? I would really appreciate any help I could get, as I am in quite a rut and I haven’t been feeling myself for quite a while. This is a worry that has lasted about 20 years. Every little preference given to another sibling of mine, when in contrast I am rejected by my parents multiple times—it all feels like a stab to the chest. I have now grown into an adult and feel like I can and not keep this up much longer. I need to build my own life. What should I do?

This is a really tough situation. I think the original poster already knows this, but your father is sabotaging your career. He is taking out some weird vendetta or jealousy, as you put it, for all the wrong reasons, when in reality, in my opinion, he should be raising you to eventually replace him at his job. I mean, why on Earth is he acting like this? And to give special treatment to your brother and allow him to get more hours in a career that he’s not even going to go into—that just doesn’t make any sense.

I can understand part-time work if you’re going to college or something like that, or if you just needed a job when you’re in between life events. But this guy is actively trying to slow down your career and giving your brother an advantage. They clearly see him as the favorite, and they’re completely ignoring your hard work and efforts that have gotten you to this point. And you’re right—you can achieve a lot more without your family.

So, in my opinion, if I was in your shoes, I would 100 take that job with another company. I would rather take my chances with somebody else and get a job but another company, despite the fact that your dad is also in this profession, to try and make a name for yourself there. Maybe there, at least, you would have the opportunity to get your teeth sunk into this profession, because right now it simply does not feel like your dad is willing to work with you, which is completely counterintuitive and so unfair.

I also don’t think this is something that has to be right away. I think, if anything, you could just go with the flow and try and just tough it out with your dad for the time being, only to then use that job to get a better job. I’ve had to do that. It is very miserable, but you know what? It pays off in the end, so that is definitely an option.

I think regardless, you sound like a very driven individual, and whatever you decide to do I’m sure you’re going to succeed, because you’ve worked very hard to get where you’re at, and no one’s gonna stop your hard work and dedication to your profession—not even your dad who clearly favors your brother.

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